https://vinyl-tardigrade.tumblr.com/

thevelvetpelican:Reblog this if you’re pro-receiving a brown paper package containing one (1)...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 19:12:23 -0400

Reblog this if you’re pro-receiving a brown paper package containing one (1) handwritten love letter, a small jar of strawberry jam from the farmers market, and a smattering of pressed flowers.

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Tue, 26 Jun 2018 14:24:18 -0400

siriusyblack: Vine references: Harry Potter Characters Harry: Well I’m doing just fine…I lied I’m...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 12:31:46 -0400

siriusyblack:

Vine references: Harry Potter Characters
Harry: Well I’m doing just fine…I lied I’m dying inside
Ron: i don’t have enough money for chicken nuggets
Hermione: that is not correct. Because according to the encyclopaedia of pl-pl-pl-pl-pl-
Neville: Hurricane Katrina? More like Hurricane tortilla
Luna: he needs some milk
Ginny: Go back to sleep, and starve.
Draco: hey loser, say kid backwards! [dik?] Ha ha, that’s gay…
Dumbledore: [HoW dO yOu kNoW wHaT’s gOoD fOr mE?] THAT’S MY OPINIONNN!!!..
Snape: *to the ghostbusters theme song* I’m an adult virgin
Lily: oh my god why can’t you just take the freaking compliMEEEENTT
James: People constantly ask me what’s it like to be a sexy-
Sirius: All I wanna tell you is school’s not important… Be whatever you wanna be. If you wanna be a dog…RUFF. You know?
Remus: [dad, look! it’s the good kush…] This is the dollar store how good can it be?
Peter: I brought you Myrrh [thank you] Mur-dur! [huh…Judas..no]
McGonagall: smack that bitch
Flitwick: I said whoever threw that paper, your moms a hoe!
Hagrid: look at all those chickens
Arthur: road work ahead? Yeah I sure hope it does
Molly: every time you don’t yell at your kids, put a quarter in your sock and soon you’ll have a weapon to beat-
Bill: wOw
Charlie: So no head?
Percy: Hey everybody, today my brother pushed me, so I’m starting a kickstarter to put him down. The benefits of killing him would be: I would get pushed way less.
Fred: can I get a waffle? Can I please get a waffle?
George: I’m John Cena!
Tonks: This bitch empty, YEET!
Moody: I wanna be a cowboy baby
Colin: That was legitness
Cho: Chris is that a weed?
Cedric: Oh my god they were roommates
Fleur: hi, I’m Renata Bliss and I’m your freestyle dance teacher
Victor: *slides in* Good evening
Dudley: Whaddup my name is Jared, I’m 19, and I never fucking learnt how to read
Petunia: I saw you hanging out with caitlin yesterday!! [r-rebecca, it’s not what you think!] i won’t hesitate, bitch! * pew pew *
Vernon: the cheese of truth *puts cheese on newspaper* immigrants cause cancer
Dobby: Hi welcome to chilli’s
Hedwig: Bitch I hope the fuck you do! You’ll be a dead son of a bitch I tell you
Narcissa: two shots of vodka *pours in half a bottle of vodka*
Bellatrix: I love you bitch. I ain’t never gonna stop loving you….bitch.
Voldemort: I’m a bad bitch you can’t kill me

britishladiesdaily: Letitia Wright for Tatler UK by Edwin S....

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 09:36:16 -0400

britishladiesdaily:

Letitia Wright for Tatler UK by Edwin S. Freyer (November 2017)

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Tue, 26 Jun 2018 04:48:30 -0400

iron-legion-cyborg: Ironhusbands will always be my shit dude.

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 03:18:42 -0400

iron-legion-cyborg:

Ironhusbands will always be my shit dude.

totallynotalesbian1212: beachdeath: antoni: so i think, um, i’d like to get you eating something...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 22:57:48 -0400

totallynotalesbian1212:

beachdeath:

antoni: so i think, um, i’d like to get you eating something other than cat food, so we’re going to learn a couple of simple recipes, like –

charlie: recipes? i mean, i don’t know if that’s really for me, like..

antoni: wh-why wouldn’t recipes be –

charlie: ‘cause i kind of can’t read?

fab 5: *stunned silence*

*cut to talking head*

karamo: charlie just told us that he can’t read

Charlie at the end of the week: *can read 3 letter words"

Jonathan: ooh we love a man who’s literate 😍😍😍

thatsthat24: When You Find the One 📒

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 22:25:15 -0400

thatsthat24:

When You Find the One 📒

WHAT THE HAP IS FUCKENING

Sat, 23 Jun 2018 19:12:20 -0400

whatdoyoumeantheresonly3episodes: I don’t know about y'all but the most terrifying prospect about...

Sat, 23 Jun 2018 14:44:44 -0400

whatdoyoumeantheresonly3episodes:

I don’t know about y'all but the most terrifying prospect about the alternative universe is that cecil wasn’t very close to Old Woman Josie

reblog if you feel personally victimised by ep 107

Sat, 23 Jun 2018 14:42:33 -0400

lierdumoa: mckitterick: friendlytroll: the1timelady: silverhawk: dare i say that stuffed animals...

Sat, 23 Jun 2018 12:47:49 -0400

lierdumoa:

mckitterick:

friendlytroll:

the1timelady:

silverhawk:

dare i say that stuffed animals are one of the single greatest inventions of all time and im thankful every day for the fact that someone thought to make animals but in huggable plush form…..saved me from a lot of bad nights and nightmares as a kid, i love you stuffed animals

You may offer your thanks to Magarete Steiff

She lived in Germany and could be considered as the first person to sew stuffed animals merly for children to play with and to counter the common “hard” toys out of wood or metal wich were popular back then.

There is even so much more to the story, because she was as you can see paraliezed from polio, she couldnt walk or use her right arm, she had to fight all her life just to be accpeted as a human being, she wasnt even allowed to sit in the front row of church in her home village and had a pretty abusive mother. One time she and her brother almost drowned but the townpeople only attempted to save her brother because he was healty. Her father saved her from drowning in last minute.

Only her father and brother stood behind her, still she learned to accept her faith and make the best out of it. After a failed operation she said she had gone around living this way anyways. She started to sew, more importantly she started to sew with a sewing machine wich was realy new at this time. People would not buy from her at first but then she made a realy beautyfull dress for her best friend and suddenly everyone was crazy for her work.

Then she started to sew little elephants as pincushions, but when she attempted to sell them around christmas she quickly realized that for one children were crazy for them and wanted them as toys and also. this was what she wanted to do, bringing happiness to kids.

She expanded futher and gave work to over 20 women as sewers in her factory, her brother helped her to do so, and she started producing stuffed animals of all kinds (almost) their trademark was a button sewed into every anmals ear. It still is to this day.

Whit the economy crisis her factory, and she almost lost it, she already couldnt pay her workers, he factory was about to be forceclosed and the last hope was a toy fair they would attend,

and then she had an idea, she sewed a bear, the very first stuffed toy bear there was, with moveable head and limbs and realy soft fur and glass eyes, it was beautyfull, but at the toyfair most people thoght it was to expensive

most people because one american buyer fell in love with the bears, he bought them all and he ordered 3000 more, it saved the factory

you may ask why would anyone need 3000 stuffed toy bears easy, to support and advertise the candidacy of Theodore Roosevelt as the U.S. president, trough that the toy bear invented by Magarete Steiff became well known as the

Teddy Bear

<3

Her wiki article: X

Weird that the teddy bear wikipedia page only credits Richard Steiff.

c-bassmeow: thighschool: ironpour: ryangoslingofficial: ryangoslingofficial: “Koko, the gorilla...

Sat, 23 Jun 2018 00:35:06 -0400

c-bassmeow:

thighschool:

ironpour:

ryangoslingofficial:

ryangoslingofficial:

“Koko, the gorilla famous for knowing sign language, was asked where gorillas go after death, she responded by signing “Comfortable hole, bye.”“

“Comfortable hole, bye “

RIP Queen :/

rip koko </3

atheist icon

robbieamell: The thing is, if you’re taught to hide what makes...

Fri, 22 Jun 2018 23:54:37 -0400

robbieamell:

The thing is, if you’re taught to hide what makes you different, you can end up feeling a lot of shame about who you are, and that’s not okay.

sapphea: ehrnst:@arqueete i found it the other day randomly,...

Fri, 22 Jun 2018 23:53:40 -0400

sapphea:

ehrnst:
@arqueete i found it the other day randomly, but this is the program from the lincoln center!

some noticeable changes are that there are two characters that were cut, franz and fritz, and they sing in touch me instead of ernst, the stranger of course is different and he sings a lot of the songs melchior has now, and thea sings the dark i know well instead of martha with franz, ernst, and georg. also there are obviously a number of songs that have been cut/changed!

idk if this is common knowledge or not but afaik this is the most complete (audio only) recording of this read-through!! it’s pretty cool to listen to— it has all of the songs and snippets from select scenes before and after. also, all numb and comet on its way BANG w full orchestration

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Fri, 22 Jun 2018 19:12:23 -0400

mouseidk-inactive: Do you ever listen to music at night and focus on the music you’re listening to...

Fri, 22 Jun 2018 17:36:22 -0400

mouseidk-inactive:

Do you ever listen to music at night and focus on the music you’re listening to and you just get hit by a whirlwind of emotions because the lyrics to a song are so good and you’ve never realised it before because you’ve never really focused on it that much, you’ve always been like “Yeah that’s songs cool, I like it a lot” but NOW you’re like ‘holyfuckingshit this song is amazing I love it" ??? Cause same

rogueofstorms: butlerbookbinding: annathecrow: annathecrow: ardatli: annathecrow: butlerbookbin...

Fri, 22 Jun 2018 13:44:47 -0400

rogueofstorms:

butlerbookbinding:

annathecrow:

annathecrow:

ardatli:

annathecrow:

butlerbookbinding:

aviculor:

toastedpopsicle:

lokiloo:

I hate hate HATE all those 2edgy 4me theories about kids shows. Like Angelica dreaming up the rugrats, or the ed, edd, and eddy children being ghosts, or literally anything that takes a lighthearted and fun kids show and has to turn it into some tragic take of rape or murder or misinformed mental illness.

So you know what? From now on I’m gonna do the exact opposite. Every cool grim-dark show is now because of a bunch of children. To get us started:

Game of Thrones: A middle-school DnD campaign with the most angry, vindictive DM who has promised to kill everyone’s player characters (and their family) by the end.

The Walking Dead: Some 13 year olds playing with nerf guns, but trying to be really serious about it because they’re all self conscious about playing with toys.

Breaking Bad: a teacher gave a kid some confiscated rock candy and now they’re fantasizing about his personal life.

*blesses you all for this*

Supernatural: a couple tween goth girls RPing with their OCs

Orphan Black: A girl has way too many identical barbie dolls, and makes them over instead.

Firefly: group of white suburbia kids can’t agree whether they want to play cowboys, Star Trek, pirates, or ninjas.

Blade: revenge fantasy of a tiny angry black girl shunned by a group of Twilight fangirls.

IT GOT BETTER.

Omfg these are great

thunder-scientist: thorbruce ficletIn which Bruce and Thor get stuck in a closet and Bruce freaks...

Fri, 22 Jun 2018 13:42:16 -0400

thunder-scientist:

thorbruce ficlet
In which Bruce and Thor get stuck in a closet and Bruce freaks out.
———————————————————
Great. This was just great. Like the day wasn’t already shitty enough.
Bruce had been working on experiments all day long, but they just wouldn’t. work. Nothing went the way he wanted them to and it made him very grumpy and that does not bode well for anyone around him.
But today he was alone in the lab. Tony was on a no-technology holiday with Pepper, which was nice for them, but not so nice for Bruce seeing as he now didn’t have anyone to ask to get a replacement for one of the parts that just got fried by a faulty current.
He sighed, glancing over once more at the failed experiment before him and lightly stomped off to one of the storage closets in the tower.
He entered and started searching for the box containing the piece he needed. As soon as he found it, he pulled out the box from the shelves, grabbed the piece and went on his way out.
He pulled at the door. It wouldn’t budge.
He pulled again.
Shit. Locked in.
So that’s how he got stuck in this situation. Of course he had to forget about the stupid fucking memo Tony left him on his desk this morning before he left saying “don’t go in here ‘cause the lock’s broken”. He groaned in frustration. God, he can be so stupid sometimes so stupidstupidstupidfuck– but wait. There was something else about it, about his desk. Something important. He wracked his brain and suddenly it hit him. His cellphone. He grabbed his cellphone from his desk right before he left the lab! He could scream out of relief that he hadn’t been a complete moron, but instead just half of one.
He triumphantly pulled it out of his pocket and immediately sent a text to Thor – “Help. Storage closet 09. Hurry.” – and waited. He was hoping Thor’s “How To Use Midgardian Cell Phones And Other Technology” lessons with Peter had been kind of useful. He’d been getting them ever since they came back to Earth and wondered if he even knew how unlock the damn thing. He thought back with a smile to the times he saw him fumbling with the device only to electrocute it in rage if it didn’t work. He’d gone through about 15 phones in an entire month once. But apparently he had gotten a little bit better at it since it didnt take long for the God to arrive.
“BANNER! Are you alright?!” he yelled, barging straight into the already small space.
“Thor, yeah, yeah, don’t worry I’m fine, everything’s fine just please hold the-”
Thunk.
“-door open.”
Bruce rubbed his eyes and sighed in defeat.
“I’m sorry I didn’t know,” Thor said, with an apologetic smile. He tried pulling at the door to open it but it was no use.
“No it’s fine, Thor. You didn’t know. It’s just- my phone battery just died, so I can’t reach anyone else,” Bruce said, holding up the phone to show him.
“Ah yes, phones,” Thor smiled, “The spider boy has been teaching me a great deal about those!”
“Do you happen to have yours with you?”
“Im afraid not, Banner. As soon as I unlocked the thing and saw your text, I dropped everything and came looking for you,” Thor explained. Bruce turned slightly pink. He dropped everything to come looking for me.
“I-In hindsight I should maybe have said it with less urgency,” Bruce stammered. He shifted uncomfortably. He didn’t really know how to react to the admission of being one of Thor’s priorities. “Did you tell anyone you were coming here to get me?”
Thor shook his head. He leaned against the shelf and slid down until he was sitting. “Guess we’ll have to wait for someone to find us.”
“Of course this had to happen to me of all people,” Bruce muttered to himself, pacing around the room. Not that there was a lot of place to do so, but he did it anyway.
Of course he had to get stuck. He already can’t stand being in small spaces and definitely not when there’s a handsome Norse God sitting so goddamn close to him. After he had discovered there was something more he was feeling towards Thor he couldn’t help but revert back to his old habits. He started subtly avoiding the times he would be completely alone with him, always making sure there was at least one other person in the room so was easier to hide the nervousness he felt around him. He can’t let anyone get too close and risk getting hurt or hurting someone else.
Now however he had nowhere to go. The thought of him being stuck here for hours made him feel more and more anxious as time passed on. He started lightly pulling at his hair.
Nowhere to escape. He started breathing faster. Thor looked up, curious.
“Banner?“
No escape no escape no escape nowhere to hide-
“Banner? Are you okay?” More insisting this time. Bruce heard some rustling but he was so caught up in his thoughts that it sounded very distant.
Oh god I’m stuck in a closet, stuck with Thor in a closet Thor of all people this is not gonna end well he’s gonna find out he’s gonna hate me fuck fuck fuck goddamnit Tony why didn’t you tell me-
He squeezed his eyes shut, a frown forming on his forehead, trying to stop his racing thoughts.
No goddamnit Bruce why didn’t you read the fucking paper fuck fuck why did you have to fall in love with him why why why-
He felt two hands wrap around his biceps, stopping him in his tracks. He was panting. He slowly opened his eyes and looked right into Thor’s. His hands shifted to Bruce’s neck.
“Breathe, Bruce.”
This was all too much. The soft tone in his voice, Thor’s strong hands clutching his arms, keeping him steady, the concerned look in his eyes and he was so close, so close-
Bruce’s brain short circuited. His hands moved from his own hair to the sides of Thor’s face. He stood up on his tippy toes and put his lips on Thor’s.
Thor squeaked in surprise and suddenly Bruce’s brain caught up. He pushed himself off of Thor, shocked, eyes wide. He’d really fucked up.
"Oh god. Oh no god I’m- Thor, I’m- I didn’t-,” Bruce stuttered, voice breaking. His eyes slowly filled with tears.
He just collapsed on the floor. He hugged his knees close to his body and pressed the palms of his hands into his eyes. Uneaven breaths, lightly shaking.
What have I done…
He could hear Thor bend down to sit down in front of him.
“Bruce. Look at me.”
Brce shook his head. He felt Thor’s hands grab his wrist.
“Please.”
Bruce left out a shaky breath and relaxed a bit. Thor gently pulled away his hands from his eyes, giving Bruce the possibility of resisting. Bruce slowly looked up, afraid to see anger or disappointment in the other’s eyes. Instead he was met with an understanding look and a smile. He relaxed a little bit more. Thor noticed and smiled a little wider.
“It’s okay,” Thor whispered, stroking Bruce’s wrists with his thumbs. They sat like that for a while until Bruce had calmed down almost completely. He still worried about what would happen next. He kept glancing over at Thor and everytime he did Bruce quickly averted his eyes again, blushing furiously and the lights above would flicker lightly.
“Are you… feeling better?”
Bruce bit his lip and nodded. He wanted to thank him for not getting angry, for staying with him, for calming him down but as he looked into Thor’s eyes the words got stuck in his throat.
He saw something in Thor’s eyes that he couldn’t quite place. They were soft and open and calm. He had uncounsciously moved forward a little to get a closer look and only noticed when Thor did the same.
“Banner, there’s no need to be afraid,” Thor said with a smile. He let go of his wrists and placed them back on his neck, thumbs now stroking his jawline. He slowly moved forward, giving Bruce plenty of time to stop him if he wanted to. Their foreheads were touching and Bruce swore he could feel electricity in the air.
“Is this okay?”
Bruce breathed out a small “yes” and Thor kissed him. Softly. Slowly. Gently. Again and again and again. Thor hands in his hair, his hands on Thor’s forearms.
Bruce pulled back, breathless, and chuckled. His skin was thrumming with electricity. Thor grabbed the back of his neck and put one last kiss on his forehead.
“We’re okay.”

madejlesbian:before i disappear into the woods anyone wanna admit they got a crush on me??

Fri, 22 Jun 2018 13:37:57 -0400

madejlesbian:

before i disappear into the woods anyone wanna admit they got a crush on me??